premature

Hi.
My name is Ayfa Çao Rebekah Twomey.
I'm nineteen years old,

and I'm tired of life.




I moved out of my parental home two years ago.
I pay bills.
I pay rent.
I pick up my social services payment every Thursday.

I've stopped making my own meals.
My new haircuts and piercings no longer thrill me.
I dream of sunnier times.
I want to be alone more and more.

People wear me out.
My friends are going, going, gone.

We're born, we grow up.
Growing up is all about discovery.
We discover life during childhood.
We discover ourselves during teenagehood.
We discover true love during adulthood.

We go to college, or get a job, and we get paid every week or month.
We meet someone.
We get married, or whatever our creed allows / dictates.
We have children.

Then the discovery is gone.
We've discovered life, ourselves, love, education, work, marriage, childbirth.

And then we wait to die.




Going, going...




I want him to say he loves me, just once.